If you can see it, you can make it happen (or maybe not!) Part II

In the previous post, we discussed the need for “enough” energy to effect “change” in our life, and we learned that we already “have” that energy, however, we consistently “sqander it” on shared nostalgic reminiscences of the past…

How is this happening and why?

Remember the grazed knee at the age of four, that brought one or both of your parents hurriedly to your side? or maybe the tonsils operation at six, when you were showered with gifts and ice-cream to heal your brocken voice… or, maybe you remember neither, as there was no one to really take care of you then….

“We don’t want to solve our problems, we want the attention that goes with the problem” Zig Ziglar

1. We have learned to “connect” with other people through our wounds, it is how we feel intimate with others, “we share our PAINS” with them.
2. Wounds also give us an amazing leverage, an unlimited source of excuses for not doing anything that might ”shove” us out of our “comfort zones”, where we un-easily wait for the next “rescue” and wonder if its ever going to arrive.

Reflecting on the above, and watching our thoughts, proves the “crazy” thought of actually wanting the negative result in our lives, TRUE!

Steps to get out of the loop-hole (what do we do to get our energy back)

First, realize that ”Only Fresh wounds require attention” Caroline Myss, otherwise you are lingering in a draining victim attitude…

Now get to action:

• Un-like what a therapist might say, we do not really need to go back to every incident in our “pain” memory, as “time” has done what it can to bring the shattered ends back together… however, life will humorously keep re-packaging old memories in a deceivingly new ”wrap” and Present-ing it, for us to solve ( if we are there to receive it). We need to be there, and receive it (not necessarily with elegance!), or we will be missing another chance at removing this chapter from our life completely.

• Change the past,  subjectively we can, we have an extremely selective memory and thus can alter our choice of identifying with the unhappy instances in our lives. Visualizations and meditation techniques, may help us access the unconscious parts of our mind (where we hide the memories)…  a favourite one I have learned and used successfully with some of my clients, comes from one of the Best in this field, Coach Dania Dbaibo, to learn it yourself go to her blog-post here, you will be guided in a relaxed state to the archive room in your psyche (the subconscious mind) and will be allowed  to go through your archives, tearing away all the unwanted memories… there you go, you just changed your past.

• EFT  (Emotional Freedom Technique), this is a DIY technique (can also be done with an EFT therapist), which involves tapping on certain points on our face and body (using our own fingers), a modern twist that uses ancient chinese philosophy, and helps move a person quickly beyond “feeling stuck”.

• Changing the “HOW” and “WHO” of our conversation… by starting to figure out ways to bond with others through our strengths  (love, interests, hobbies, hamsters…ok so I am getting creative… but you did get my point!)

• And finally, we need to give up the need to find out “Why things happen, and why certain people act a certain way!”  focusing on “Trusting what comes” while strengthening our connection to the source of Light and Truth…

Have fun and stay energized

ruba